You know the drill by now. Episode here and thoughts below.
A fairly quiet episode this week despite the return of Jason and Heidi's Lady-Macbeth-as-a-ninny impersonation. So quiet, in fact, that this week, we don't have a quote of the week nor do we get to play You Look Like A Pratt. A damn shame, that, but hopefully, next week will make up it. Anyway, moving on:
Lauren's relationship with Jason reminds me of The Godfather (as well as a soured relationship of my own): "Just when I thought that I was out, they pull me back in!" Thank God she didn't follow it up with Al Pacino's signature 'Hoo-ahhh!' That would have been disturbing.
Without Spencer's Machiavellian scheming, Heidi wouldn't have even have thought to snake the position from Elodie. No-one deserves the job more than Heidi?! Come on! What does she even do? Does loitering around the Bolthouse offices and provides her boss with gossip regarding her ex-BFFE really constitute as 'work'? Spencer is definitely the Iago to Heidi's (very stupid, very blonde) Othello. I can't believe Heidi actually had the gall to tell Elodie that she, "didn't want to step on anyone's toes." Isn't that exactly what she did?
Derek and Jarrett -- is there some factory in Jersey that mass-produces guys like this? The gym-rat-tight-tee-wearing-overgelled idiot? Does anyone actually find this attractive? Lauren said she wanted to stab herself in the eye during this excruciating date. I wanted to stab myself in the eye while watching this excruciatingly painful encounter. I mean, honestly -- who dedicates that much time to talking about vintage shirts that cost $0.40?
Let's talk Jason -- still looks like a feral beaver and still reeks of Eau de Douche. His appearance on The Hills isn't what interests me, though. MTV finally jumped on the Dancing/Skating/Knitting with the Celebrities bandwagon with Celebrity Rap Superstar -- a show that couples Q-list hip-hop hopefuls with rappers as their mentors. The 'talent' on this show?
Shar Jackson (I have this theory that your celebrity stock immediately plummets when you come into contact with Federline DNA), Perez Hilton (who kinda looks like he'll be appearing on an episode of To Catch A Predator in the very-near future)
See what I mean?
Sebastian Bach (Is there a television show he won't do?), Countess Vaughan (The Curse of Moesha, perhaps? It's like the Poltergeist curse...only much, much lamer), Jamal Anderson of the Atlanta Falcons (one too many hits to the head?), Playboy Playmate and Girl-Next-Door Kendra Wilkinson (because one lame reality-based television show just isn't enough), Efren Ramirez (that poor bastard will be known as 'Pedro' for the res of his life, no matter what he does) and rounding out this cast of winners is our very own J.Wahl.
I caught him on TV a couple of nights ago performing the LL Cool J classic, Goin' Back To Cali. Now, I know they say there's too much violence in hip-hop but if Uncle LL appeared and knocked him out, I think it would be completely justified.
What Lauren ever saw in this toolbox,I'll never understand.
Next week -- more Lauren and Jason! More Heidi and Spencer! And hopefully, a little less Justin-Bobby.
A fairly quiet episode this week despite the return of Jason and Heidi's Lady-Macbeth-as-a-ninny impersonation. So quiet, in fact, that this week, we don't have a quote of the week nor do we get to play You Look Like A Pratt. A damn shame, that, but hopefully, next week will make up it. Anyway, moving on:
Lauren's relationship with Jason reminds me of The Godfather (as well as a soured relationship of my own): "Just when I thought that I was out, they pull me back in!" Thank God she didn't follow it up with Al Pacino's signature 'Hoo-ahhh!' That would have been disturbing.
Without Spencer's Machiavellian scheming, Heidi wouldn't have even have thought to snake the position from Elodie. No-one deserves the job more than Heidi?! Come on! What does she even do? Does loitering around the Bolthouse offices and provides her boss with gossip regarding her ex-BFFE really constitute as 'work'? Spencer is definitely the Iago to Heidi's (very stupid, very blonde) Othello. I can't believe Heidi actually had the gall to tell Elodie that she, "didn't want to step on anyone's toes." Isn't that exactly what she did?
Derek and Jarrett -- is there some factory in Jersey that mass-produces guys like this? The gym-rat-tight-tee-wearing-overgelled idiot? Does anyone actually find this attractive? Lauren said she wanted to stab herself in the eye during this excruciating date. I wanted to stab myself in the eye while watching this excruciatingly painful encounter. I mean, honestly -- who dedicates that much time to talking about vintage shirts that cost $0.40?
Let's talk Jason -- still looks like a feral beaver and still reeks of Eau de Douche. His appearance on The Hills isn't what interests me, though. MTV finally jumped on the Dancing/Skating/Knitting with the Celebrities bandwagon with Celebrity Rap Superstar -- a show that couples Q-list hip-hop hopefuls with rappers as their mentors. The 'talent' on this show?
Shar Jackson (I have this theory that your celebrity stock immediately plummets when you come into contact with Federline DNA), Perez Hilton (who kinda looks like he'll be appearing on an episode of To Catch A Predator in the very-near future)
See what I mean?
Sebastian Bach (Is there a television show he won't do?), Countess Vaughan (The Curse of Moesha, perhaps? It's like the Poltergeist curse...only much, much lamer), Jamal Anderson of the Atlanta Falcons (one too many hits to the head?), Playboy Playmate and Girl-Next-Door Kendra Wilkinson (because one lame reality-based television show just isn't enough), Efren Ramirez (that poor bastard will be known as 'Pedro' for the res of his life, no matter what he does) and rounding out this cast of winners is our very own J.Wahl.
I caught him on TV a couple of nights ago performing the LL Cool J classic, Goin' Back To Cali. Now, I know they say there's too much violence in hip-hop but if Uncle LL appeared and knocked him out, I think it would be completely justified.
What Lauren ever saw in this toolbox,I'll never understand.
Next week -- more Lauren and Jason! More Heidi and Spencer! And hopefully, a little less Justin-Bobby.
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