Mom: Oh, I talked to your cousin today.
Jaime: Yeah? How is he?
Mom: He's good, he's good. He lost his job.
Jaime: .....
Losing your job is good if:
+ You're a drug mule who shoves heroin-filled balloons up your ass.
+ You're an interspecies erotica artist.
+ You work on the set of an Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg movie.
My cousin works in finance.
Right....
Jaime: Yeah? How is he?
Mom: He's good, he's good. He lost his job.
Jaime: .....
Losing your job is good if:
+ You're a drug mule who shoves heroin-filled balloons up your ass.
+ You're an interspecies erotica artist.
+ You work on the set of an Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg movie.
My cousin works in finance.
Right....
BWAHAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
ReplyDeleteHey! I made one of these things :) Add me
ReplyDeleteSo -- My mom has the tact of a bulldozer. It's pretty hilarious.
ReplyDeleteHey, this is Lizzie, Sarika's friend. I lurk around your blog all the time like a creep, and I just wanted to let you know you're friggin' hilarious and an excellent writer.
ReplyDeleteThat is all.
Hi Sarika's friend, Lizzie! Thanks for visiting and for all your sweet words! I'm glad someone appreciates the random inanity that is my life :)
ReplyDelete